Wednesday, November 25, 2009

They Just Like to Blow Shit Up

The wingnuts are at it again - now they have a plan1 to slaughter all the prairie dogs - not with something as tame as poisons (heck the GOP thinks poisons are fine, as long as it's in food coming from China) but instead with exploding gas. I can almost hear the hillbilly howls of glee now: "Lookee thar Junior! That blowed up reeeaaal good!"

I can understand their eagerness too - with someone like Gabe Santos on council, they no doubt have a gigantic supply of (ahem) natural gas. Trouble is, the system2 they're looking at uses propane. Might take a few custom adapters to get it hooked up to our erstwhile councilman. Besides, flow-control could also be a problem, especially after some of the lunches he eats. But I digress.

Besides, the Dept of Agriculture tried em and they don't work:

"Gas exploding devices or anhydrous ammonia or other toxic gases have not proven to be safe, reliable or effective. The best studies have shown that oxy-acetylene or propane/oxygen mixtures injected for 45 seconds and then ignited only reduced ground squirrel populations by about 40 per cent and did so at a very high cost. Although no data has been generated on the effectiveness of anhydrous ammonia, there has been, at best, mixed comments on its use. Cost, practically, safety and labour are considered serious drawbacks to anhydrous ammonia fumigation."

So if it doesn't work for squirrels, the no-doubt hardier prarie dogs will likely be even less affected. More likely the lil varmints will turn the tables on our would-be extermination advocates and send them all sky-high when their boom-boom machine blows up in their faces.

However, I'm not sure that would be a bad thing... evolution takes a lot of forms3.

Go get em kids, mind the buried services while you're at it - please?

1.  Yes, another. I'm sure they're fantasizing about something to exterminate their opponents too...

2.  I omit the name because it's a pathetic jury-rigged POS with a hyper-macho name and a hefty pricetag. Fine to blow $ on this shit and let the city fall apart.

3.  And heaven knows they could use some evolving... especially to get rid of that monobrow...

Family Research Council Is Thankful for Lack of Fact-Checkers:

From the Rude Pundit:

Family Research Council Is Thankful for Lack of Fact-Checkers:

In case you were there sittin' around with yer families, all around that mighty Thanksgiving table tomorrow, starin' at each other across the steroid-enhanced gigantor turkey, the mashed potatoes larded with hormone-filled cream and butter, high fructose corn syrup-based pies, the whole pesticide-coated cornucopia, and you were wonderin' to high holy heaven just what the hell you can beg Godjeezus fer in yer grace-sayin', then the Family Research Council's Super-Duper Prayer Team has answered

The Rude Pundit joined the Super-Duper Prayer Team several years ago under a nom de rude (so he can be a spy in the house o' love), and every week he receives his dirty prayerchez orders, telling him what to implore the invisible sky wizard to do to others and/or for us. This week, it's a special Thanksgiving version, which did you know is all about socialism?

Aw, sure. "In their struggle to survive in the New World, our Pilgrim Fathers learned that socialism does not work! A two-year long experiment in 1621-1622 taught them that when government redistributes income, scarcity, dependence and even death result...For their first two years at Plymouth, the Pilgrims embraced a well-intended scheme: the fruit of each man's labor went into a common storehouse; each then took from the storehouse as his family had need," says the FRC (motto: "Your one-stop history filter"). "Laziness and thievery resulted when capable men refused to labor but demanded to be fed." Then, one might imagine, they got drunk and had a giant gay orgy since apparently no women were around. It's why the sexual position known as "pilgrim buggery" involves buckles and...oh, wait. No?

Hells, no. According to the FRC, then good and wise Governor Billy Bradford changed shit around, "requiring each family to raise its own food." And they lived happily ever after because from 1623 on because of "the hard lessons about socialism and the benefits of free enterprise learned by those who inspired Thanksgiving Day."

And that'd be awesome if it was true. However, that version of the pilgrim story "misrepresents the purpose of the Pilgrims and the results of their heroic strivings. It derives from a superficial appraisal of a statement by Governor William Bradford and a partial reading of the copious records left by the literate Pilgrims." That quote is not from some wild and woolly liberal blog spouting socialist propaganda. It's actually from a 1976 publication by the John fuckin' Birch Society (hence the "heroism" of Indian slaying). And if those paranoid motherfuckers decide something ain't socialist, it ain't fuckin' socialist. Even rabid right-wingers know the real story is so much more complex that there's no way to reduce to a grunting "socialism bad, capitalism good" simian dichotomy.

(Of course, the notion that it was only stupid, selfish white people who couldn't live communally in the "New World" doesn't come into play here.)

But, still, this is supposed to be about the mighty, mighty praytones of Thanksgiving, and here's the kick-Karl-Marx-in-the-taint prayer: "May families across America, especially Christians, reflect this Thanksgiving upon these great lessons of socialism vs. liberty," and further, "May we unite in prayer against every new government program built upon an ideology in which government exercises far too much power." Mmm, that makes stuffing taste so much more stuffinger.

The SDPT is always given bible verses to demonstrate that the prayers have some stamp of approval. They are almost always confounding. Like this one that's supposed to somehow relate to the pilgrim story, from Isaiah 61:1: "The Spirit of the Sovereign Lord is on me, because the Lord has anointed me to preach good news to the poor. He has sent me to bind up the brokenhearted, to proclaim freedom for the captives and release from darkness for the prisoners."

Seriously, FRC, does anyone actually read the bible there? Because not only is that a verse that asks for mercy for prisoners, but five short verses later, Isaiah 61:6-7, it actually supports socialism: "You will feed on the wealth of nations, and in their riches you will boast. Instead of their shame, my people will receive a double portion." The King James version is a hell of a lot more explicit, something that's easily interpretable as a call for revolution against the rich. Share that dinner.

Saturday, November 14, 2009

Predictions and performance

It's interesting to note these posts from the still-present - both on the same evening, about an hour apart.

January 12, 2008
Prediction: Gang of Four out in Two

The guy and gal who blog at and respectively, say it better then me, so for now, I'll let you find out about the shenanigans of the new City Council on their blogs. Really outrageous, what's going on down there.

Posted at 11:22 PM in Annexed by Boulder, Benker's Gang of Four (let's not make it five), The Future of Longmont | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBack (0)

Why this election is critical to the future of Longmont

Stephanie Baum cuts to the chase.

Longmont is at a crossroads

Posted at 09:59 PM in The Future of Longmont | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBack (0) 

I've posted numerous times about Ms. Baum's admission about - which she subsequently recanted - going to great lengths to deflect any connection, claiming she was just protecting her friend and desperate to end the accusations. Bottom line to me has become this: the supporters of Santos, Baum, Witt (and to a lesser degree Sammoury) just don't care - anything to win is the GOP's favorite slogan, after all. Mission Accomplished and it's Time to Bury the Bodies.

Well, so far they have a 50% accuracy record. Based on the nonstop drumbeat of negative attacks, I'd say McCoy and Hansen are in for a real fistfight when they're up for re-election - it's pretty clear big money in Longmont has PLANS and they're in the way.

During the last election we had a string of blogs pop up, I thought it would be good to catalog them here:

as well as the usual list of suspects that I will refrain from mentioning (again) simply because.

This battle's over but the war goes on.

Sunday, November 1, 2009

Rack 'em and Screw 'em, Boys!

Rack 'em and Screw 'em, Boys!

By Sheila Samples

Is there anything scarier than the New York Times' Halloween treat entitled, "Documents Detail Conditions Found at Secret C.I.A. Jails"?

Pardon my Palinese, but -- You betcha! You damnbetcha!

For starters, the "conditions" the Times mentions only briefly are, in reality, depraved, corrupt, immoral, inhumane torture. According to the Times...

"F.B.I. agents who arrived at a secret C.I.A. jail overseas in September 2002 found prisoners “manacled to the ceiling and subjected to blaring music around the clock,” and a C.I.A. official wrote a list of questions for interrogators including “How close is each technique to the ‘rack and screw'. . ."
What is more frightening -- that the C.I.A. got its jollies by torturing, even murdering human beings in its secret sodomy frat-houses -- or that the F.B.I. took one look, fled the scene and remained silent for years?

Perhaps it's the two-page memo President George Bush had circulated seven months earlier wherein he determined -- under his authority as Commander in Chief and Chief Executive of the United States --

"...none of the provisions of Geneva apply to our conflict with al Qaeda in Afghanistan or elsewhere throughout the world because, among other reasons, al Qaeda is not a High Contracting Party to Geneva." (emphasis added)

"...I determine that the Taliban detainees are unlawful combatants and, therefore, do not qualify as prisoners of war under Article 4 of Geneva. I note that, because Geneva does not apply to our conflict with al Qaeda, al Qaeda detainees also do not qualify as prisoners of war."

Bush then added piously that our values as a nation that we shared with many nations (?) required us to treat humanely even those not qualified as humans nor entitled to such treatment. So -- wink, wink -- rack 'em and screw 'em, boys!

According to the Times, the documents were released as a result of several Freedom of Information Act lawsuits filed by the American Civil Liberties Union and Judicial Watch. Makes you wonder if this nation's mainstream media, both print and electronic, has no access -- nor interest -- in freedom of information, doesn't it?

The Times did provide links (see below) to the released documents -- 953 pages it knew most of us would never read. To offset that, the Times assigned two of its top investigative reporters -- Scott Shane and Charlie Savage -- to get the critical information out.

These guys hopped right on it and, after yawning through the assignment, their bland 306-word "news" article was published on page A28.

I don't know about you, but even for Halloween -- that's scary!

Links to released documents via New York Times

A.C.L.U. vs. C.I.A. (SDNY) (pdf) (13 pages)
A.C.L.U. vs. D.O.D. (DDC2) (pdf) (441 pages)
Judicial Watch vs. C.I.A. (DDC) (pdf) (34 pages)
A.C.L.U. vs. D.O.D. (SDNY) (pdf) (98 pages)
A.C.L.U. vs. D.O.D. (DDC2) (pdf) (61 pages)
A.C.L.U. vs. D.O.D. (pdf) (141 pages)
Feinman vs. C.I.A. (DDC) (pdf) (163 pages)
Judicial Watch vs. D.O.J. (DDC) (pdf) (2 pages)

Sheila Samples is an Oklahoma writer and a former civilian US Army Public Information Officer. She is a regular contributor for a variety of Internet sites.